It's a dangerous business, going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you don't keep your feet, there's no telling where you might be swept off to.
- "The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring"
- "The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring"
Movie marathon aside, it has been awhile since I last posted about the journey of marriage and why I like Cory just so damn much. Warning, this post might get mushy, but only for a sentence or two.
As you all know, I went home this past weekend and it was this past weekend that brought along the most thoughts about where Cory and I are headed. From time to time, Cory and I have both made the comments that when we're our parents age, we'll still be in love as when we are now. We look at our parents, who still have such affection for each other after all these years, and we hope that our love will be the same way. It is almost uncanny that both set of parents are still together and still so in love that we have some of the best role models. I have heard the comments that some guys make that include always treating his lady as a princess and give her everything she wants, it got me to thinking about the way I love, and the way I want to be loved.
When I think about my relationship with Cor, he treats me with that chivalry from ages past and I am so grateful for that. But when it really comes down to it, I cherish our relationship because we try to treat each other as equals. My feelings for grow each day as we talk about the past and how much we have done together and as we talk of future plans. Plus, we sure do know how to have a good time. Our interests are so very different from each other and I can say with honesty that when I pictured myself getting married, it was to an avid outdoors man not an artsy fella, but by golly, I fell in love with that artsy fella. Each day I feel thankful that he chose me. We just fit together and I am a better person (albeit more nerdy) because of him. I think the three main factors in our relationship are 1. Trust. We trust each other whole heartedly and neither one of us have a jealous factor. Seriously, if girls hit on your man, it is a compliment because guess who he is going home with? 2. Honesty. Cory has always told me the truth and I have never doubted it for a minute. Me, on the other hand, have tried lying to him on multiple occasions, but I am a very bad liar. He knows me almost too well and listens to everything I say. EVERYTHING. After multiple attempts of covering up how much I spent shopping or who fed the kitty the leftover steak, I have just given up trying to lie because I have found out it’s no use. And lastly, 3. Love and laughter (okay, so maybe it’s 3. And 4. ) Because at the end of the night, I recap my days past and my days ahead and know that I will always love this man and he will always love me, make me laugh, make me smile and thankful, and keep me on my toes (told you it might get mushy) We know how to love greatly and have a good time no matter what life throws our way. (Seriously, you all should want to hang out with us). In essence, it's about those small gestures. I'm all about the simple smiles, and while flowers cleaning the house and chocolates kitty coffee mugs and diamonds taking the garbage out may be nice, I cherish those smaller things that can be done on a daily basis, almost effortlessly. A squeeze of a hand, a post-it note or text message to say "I love you", cooking a favorite meal. That's the way I love and that is why I love him.
Lately I keep hearing about the 5 Love Languages. (Okay, so maybe I just found it on Google, but I didn’t know how to work in in the conversation) so I took the test. See an excerpt from their blog post below:
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I’m convinced that keeping the emotional love tank full is as important to a marriage as maintaining the proper oil level in your car. Running your marriage on an empty love tank may cost you even more than trying to drive your car without oil. How do you fill the love tank of your spouse? You find out what makes them feel loved and then to the best of your ability, you speak their “love language.” There are five love languages: words of affirmation, gifts, acts of service, quality time, and physical touch. One of these speaks more deeply to your spouse than the other four. Learn to speak the right love language and watch your spouse begin to smile. When they feel loved, they are likely to reciprocate
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In short, this test is one that will point out the love language that best fits your life. Here’s how I scored:
8 Acts of Service
7 Physical Touch
6 Words of Affirmation
5 Quality Time
4 Receiving Gifts
I won’t include what each one means, but here is my highest scoring result:
Acts of Service
Can vacuuming the floors really be an expression of love? Absolutely! Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on an “Acts of Service” person will speak volumes. The words he or she most want to hear: “Let me do that for you.” Laziness, broken commitments, and making more work for them tell speakers of this language their feelings don’t matter. Finding ways to serve speaks volumes to the recipient of these acts.
I would be lying is I said this wasn’t true. So maybe I am a clean freak and look at vacuuming as an act of love. Don’t judge. I must say though, that the highest score is 12 and I am pretty balanced when it comes to each category (and thank the heavens that receiving gifts was lowest. I mean, I love getting presents. Like a lot. I am glad my superficial gratifications didn’t come through on a love test.) What language of love are you?
I think this also mean that if we ever meet in real life, prepare to take your shoes off before you enter my house and don’t be alarmed if I follow you around with a swifter or lint roller or god help us all if you eat a cookie without a napkin or plate underneath that cookie.
Hope you're not having a case of the Thursdays like I am and hope there's sunshine wherever you are right now!
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